Sunday, October 11, 2009

The Best Part

On Down Syndrome New Mama, there is a great post about the best part of having a child with Down syndrome. When I read her post, I thought, "Ack! I can only choose ONE thing??"

I thought about how awesome it is that Miss Banana has always been a fabulous sleeper--I can lay her down in her crib at nap time and she will put herself to sleep. Bedtime is a breeze too. And she has been sleeping through the night since she was a month old. Gotta love that!

I also thought about how awesome it is to have so many people helping me. I love all the information and help that my service coordinator, OT and ST give. Miss Banana's diagnosis really shook my confidence as a mom, but with them walking me through everything, I think I can handle it. I wish I had had that kind of support with the boys!

I love how cuddly Miss B is and how easy she is to console. When she is crying, pretty much all you have to do is pick her up and snuggle her in, and she's happy again. We've had very few of those "Is it your diaper? Are you hungry? Are you hurt? Are you sick? Is it gas? Are you hot? Are you cold? Why are you crying and why won't you stop??!!!??" moments with Miss Banana. Gotta love that too!

Another thing I love is how cute her profile is. She has these cute little chubby cheeks with this little tiny nose. It's just adorable. And that flat part between her eyes is just begging to be kissed. I love it!

There are so many little things about Miss Banana that amaze me--I really did have a hard time narrowing it down. After thinking about it for awhile, I did finally decide what I think is the best part (at least for now): it's the process, the journey, of becoming better because of her. I had a professor in college that said, "Parenting is for the parent, not the child." Yes, how we parent influences our children and their lives, but ultimately we do our best and then they are going to do what they are going to do. But as a mother, parenting is a process to go through to become better, to learn patience, to be humbled. While I was already going through some of those changes with T-Man and Fearless, after Miss B's diagnosis, I had to go through the deepest introspection I've ever had. (Hmm, maybe that shouldn't be past's still ongoing, but those first few weeks after our amnio were the most intense so far.) Her little life catapulted me to a different place as a person. A place where I need to learn to let go of whatever my expectations are and just trust God to take care of us. A place where it's okay to slow down and just live in the moment. A place that helps me be more sensitive to others and their needs. A place that teaches me about people--Miss B tends to bring out the best (and a few times, the worst) in people. While at times it is scary and stressful and crazy and just plain old hard to be on this journey, I think it has propelled me to (hopefully!) be more than I was. And that, for now, is the best part.


Sasha said...

That's a beautiful post-so true. Love the new look of the site.

Jennie said...

Great post, Carrie! (I'm from BBC, in case you were wondering how I found you).
Miss Banana is absolutely positively yummy!
And I think that letting go of my expectations might be the primary thing God has taught me through Micah... It's not about me! Sounds like something I should know already (I mean, I know the Gospel... that should be one of the earliest lessons I learned, but it's one that God has to frequently remind me of!).

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