On Facebook, a teenager that I know used the r-word. I probably should have let it go, but I promised Miss B that I would stick up for her, so I just had to say something. While most people that I know have been kind and understanding about ending the use of the r-word, this young man didn't. Here's the exchange: (I took out the names, the rest is verbatim)
Me: r*tard is a super offensive word, just as bad as the n-word. If you wouldn't use it, that would be great!
Teenager: Only r*tards are offended by the word r*tard
(At this point, I kind of snapped. I shouldn't have, especially realizing the source, but I haven't developed a thick skin yet.)
Me: what a very insensitve, inconsiderate response. I thought higher of you than that.
Seeing how my daughter has Down syndrome and will be medically diagnosed with mental retardation, I find it highly offensive for you to use the word "r*tard" to refer to anything you don't like or that you think is stupid b/c really, you are making fun of my daughter and other people that have a similar diagnosis, and I'm not okay with that.
The way I see it, only people with low emotional IQs, would continue to use a word that someone has told them is offensive and has asked them nicely to stop. Because my daughter is unable to advocate for herself at this time, I will have to do it for her. Last time I checked, my IQ was well into the 140s, which doesn't really qualify me in the "mentally retarded" range....
If your earlier post was an attempt to try to defend your use of that word, please come up with a better response.
Teenager: To be offended is a choice. It is a choice made by the person that has decided to take offense. And, according to one of the previous latter-day prophets, (I don't remember which one but I can find it if you REALLY CARE that much) taking offense to something is the result of a LACK of spiritual influence.
Me: Nice dodge, but still no good defense of the use of the r-word now that you know that it shouldn't be used.
Teenager: "dodge" ? What am I supposed to be dodging?
Trying to stop others from saying the word "r*tard" is like trying to tell someone to not say the word "tree" simply because you had a tree once that you liked and it died or something so if someone talks about trees you get sad. Sounds stupid huh? Maybe not, since you're doing it.
Also, there's no reason that I SHOULD be having to defend saying "r*tard". It's common english slang. Deal with it.
Me: Wow. Your lack of consideration for others is astounding. Unbelievable.
Teenager: Your lack of seeing this as something worthless to throw a fit over is also.
I am so furious right now, I am shaking. Is this really what the teenagers of today think??? Does my daughter really have to grow up with people that have such a complete lack of compassion??? Someone reassure me that advocacy efforts will pay off and that the world will be a better place someday.
**Update: So he did go back and delete the "only r*tards are offended by the word r*tard" so maybe he eventully realized how extremely offensive that was?
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